My verse for the year comes from this next section of reading: “H one who says he abides in Him ought himself to walk in the same manner as He walked.” 1 John 2:6 The Bible in 90 days … Continue reading
Bible in 90 Days | Day 86
Category Archives: 1 John
when you wonder how God speaks | what I’ve learned
The year comes to an end and I’m given new words I can barely speak. At first it seems sacriligious or disrespectful to write down what God gives deep. It seems wrong to put in print divine whispers. The truth is … Continue reading
Perfect Love
“Perfect Love Casts Out Fear”
For some reason this phrase from 1 John has been turning in my head for the past couple of days. I have struggled with major Fear in the past. And often it tries to reclaim its previous place in my life especially when I am not paying attention. With four kids, a husband, a dog, and all that is required of me as a mom, wife and caretaker I am easily distracted.
What has my recent distraction gotten me? I’m afraid. I’m afraid of people. Afraid to speak, afraid to find a new church…I’m sure you get the picture. You are probably wondering, “Why in the world is she afraid of people?” Don’t worry I’m not suffering from agoraphobia or even sociophobia (here is my psych degree coming in handy, FYI did you know that there is a phobia for peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth? It’s called Arachibutyrophobia. There is also one for your in-laws, but we don’t need to go there.)
I’m afraid because the very core of what I based love, friendship, and loyalty on has been fractured.
I was left reeling. The silence, gossip, actions of “friends” has set into motion a time in my life that I can only describe as agonizing. I had placed a lot of stock in “Christian Community”. From childhood to adulthood much of my time and energy has been wrapped up in the workings of Church. What do you do when everything you’ve based your current life on starts to crumble? When the blinders are stripped away? No more masks here people…just hardcore truth. How do you face the truth of what others are? And take that long, difficult look at yourself? To no longer feel like you have usefulness or purpose on this planet…now that’s an enormous pit. So I am standing on the other side of that pit a grown woman not sure what to do. My hands and knees are dirty and bleeding. My heart is pounding in confusion….and fear.
“As she sat listening in the cottage, Much-Afraid knew with a pang of agonizing pain that the Shepherd was calling her to go with him to the mountains. This was the secret signal he had promised, and he has said that she must be ready to leave instantly, the moment she heard it. Now here she was, locked inside her own cottage, beleaguered by her terrible Fears and unable to respond in any way to his call or even to give any sign of her need.” And later she realizes in a panic “…(that) she had failed to respond to the call of love and then found, too late, that Love had gone away.” (Hinds’ Feet in High Places)
He was calling her out, away from her fears, to take her on a journey…on a great adventure. An Adventure that would transform her disfigurements and disabilities into beauty through the work of His Perfect Love. But FEAR held her…placed its’ hand over her mouth and kept her locked inside her house unable to move. She was afraid of those around her, afraid no one would hear her shouts for help, afraid her lame feet wouldn’t get her there…Much-Afraid had some major agoraphobia.
“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. – I John 4: 7-19 NIV
The correlation from where I stand? It is all about Perfect Love. I’ve been unloving and unlovable, but nothing I am or do can keep me from God’s Perfect Love. And it’s this love that “casts out fear”. I’m tired. Tired of being Afraid. Tired of waiting. I’m tired of being afraid to make new friends. I want to love again. I want to trust again. It’s time to turn around, to put that pit behind me and face the here, now and forward.
Facing Forward,
J.
